Introvert Mom, Extrovert Kid: 4 Tips to Confidently Engage Your Child Without Losing Yourself

As an introverted mom, raising an extroverted kid can seem daunting at times.  How do you manage your needs and your child’s needs without feeling overwhelmed or guilty?  I’m sharing 5 tips to help you confidently engage your extroverted child without losing yourself.

Know Yourself/Know Your Child

Knowing who you are is more than just being able to slap on an introvert or extrovert label.  You must also understand what makes you tick.  What excites you?  What angers you? What makes you anxious?  Are you a morning person?  A night owl?

The better you answer questions like that about yourself and your child, the better you’re able to create opportunities for engagement that fully consider everyone’s significance.

Take that knowledge and use it to foster an environment where you feel at ease and your child is poised to thrive.

Find Common Ground

There will be times when you and your child will have to facilitate, participate in, or support activities you don’t readily enjoy.  Whenever possible, suggest activities and experiences that you both love.

Finding common interests ensures authentic engagement (Read: your children know when they’re simply being tolerated). For example, my daughter and I share a love of theater.  We love to attend live productions, watch pre-recorded presentations of our favorites, and then enjoy in-depth discussions.

Create Space

Introverts and extroverts need time to recharge.  Introverts spend time alone in order to regain their energy, while extroverts tend to seek out time with others to become energized.  The challenge: creating space for both of those actions to occur.  It’s important to make room for active time and downtime.  Don’t feel guilty for needing time to yourself, Mom.

In our home, downtime happens primarily in the early morning and evening.  Any activity during this time is quiet and relaxing (i.e., reading, coloring, daily devotional).  These times help us prepare for the day, and wind down before bed

The rest of the day is filled with homeschooling, craft projects, and activities that energize my daughter.  I’m able to fully engage because I have designated times to give myself what I need.

Expect the Best

I’m sure you’ve heard this saying before: “Mindset is everything”.  The way you approach a situation determines the experience you will have.

If you approach time with your child thinking you won’t enjoy yourself and dreading the activity, chances are that’s exactly what will happen.  If your goal is to spend quality time with your child and create lasting memories, enter into that time with your intention leading the way.  Positive outlook and interaction can make all the difference.

What are some other ways you’ve learned to manage life with your extroverted child?